Making Your Relationship Work
Making Your Relationship Work
By Mark Freeman
Ever run into a brick wall, so to speak, with your mate? Can’t seem to pass “Go” without collecting 200 fresh wounds? Well, it’s time to build a bridge and tear down that brick wall. Here are your tools:
ATTITUDE – Get an attitude adjustment first. Lighten up and do a 180-degree about face. Read the Sunday comics, grab an old comic book, turn on the Comedy channel, watch funny videos or DVDs. Get in a better mood and pass it along to your mate. Invite your mate to tune in to comedy with you, too.
2. FRIENDSHIP – Go back to being friends for starters now that you’re in a good mood. Forget the love stuff, if you want. And just focus on being good friends; share compliments, do things for one another, go out and have fun together, enjoy one another’s company.
3. RELAX – Let your hair down. Trust and relax. Be yourself. Don’t let old wounds open or fester. Forget the garbage memories and just be in the here and now together.
4. TIME OUT – If possible, spend extra time together for awhile, like during your original courting days. Hire a sitter, order out, eat at fast food places, grab ice cream cones and go for walks in the park. Get to know each other all over again. That’s the key. Then you’ll remember why you fell for each other in the beginning and history will hopefully repeat itself.
5. COMMUNICATION – Take it slow and easy. Keep away from subjects that you don’t agree upon. And slowly re-learn to communicate with each other all over again. If necessary, and it’s not a crime or shame – get help. Seek a trusted friend or adviser, a church clergy member or certified professional counselor. No need to go it alone. Find your weak areas and how to over come them and plan for future communication difficulties.
6. GOALS – Gradually develop goals together so you’ll have a direction to head. Write them down in a notebook just for the two of you. And over time, develop them, revise them, cross them off your list. The idea is to HAVE goals together and work towards a common goal.
7. SCRAP BOOK – Create a memory album together. Add photos, clippings, menus and anything that reminds you of the “good times.” Then when tough times comes, you’ll have something to “hold on to” – your bridge to romance.
So don’t just sit back and sulk. Take short steps to improve your relationships and let life’s problems magically pass by while you hold on to your relationship.
About the Author: This article provided courtesy of http://www.christian-singles-meet.com
Source: www.isnare.com
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Making Up 101 – Yes You Can Rebuild Your Relationship
Making Up 101 – Yes You Can Rebuild Your Relationship
By David Leonard Houde
How many times have you been stunned by news that a couple close to you are no more? They were meant for each other, to live out their lives together, or so you thought. You stand back and say, “I sure am glad we don’t have to deal with that, honey”. Then it happens. One things leads to another and before you know it, you are that couple you hoped you would not be. You love this man and saw the two of you growing old together – nothing would stop you or get in the way.
Sadness, anger, confusion and a number of other emotions overwhelm you – this cannot be happening! The good news is you can get your man back – even build a relationship stronger than before. Read on for ways you can achieve this.
Firstly, whatever the reason for the breakup, you have to understand that it came about because of both of you. The blame for what has happened must be accepted by both people. You might want to lash out and blame him for the breakup, and maybe a big part of the problem was on him, however, you also played a role in your relationship’s demise. Nothing will push you two apart faster that blame and pointing fingers. The sooner you accept that, the quicker you can move on to rebuild your bonds of love.
Do not smother him. Think about the word, “smother”. When something is smothered, it dies. Taking small steps at a time are much more effective than pushing everything to change over night. Patience is key here – if you want to rebuild your relationship, you have to be able to see it through – how ever long it takes. Anything worth build or saving takes time, patience, persistence and did I mention patience? Start rebuilding your relationship one block at a time. While you want everything between you to be “like it was before”, you must understand you can NEVER get back what you had. You are creating a new love based on what works between you, and trying your hardest to avoid what did not work.
You must be able to communicate with each other. And communication without listening is not communication. If you talk and do not listen, you are doing yourself a disservice. Your man, usually, is not going to be the great communicator you are. If he does communicate with you, listen to what he has to say and respond to what you hear. I would avoid the heavy conversations to begin with, start with basics. Think back to when you first dated – what were some of the conversations like? Probably you had light conversations, safe conversations, and that created a welcoming atmosphere. As you both are able to talk about the basics, you will find it easier to communicate about the big things.
Not all relationships were meant to last forever, and usually the reasons they do not last is due to one or both people’s selfishness. Be each others’ cheerleader and instead of it always being about you, let it be about them. Find out more ways to rebuild your relationship below.
About the Author: You have shared too many great moments together to just throw it away. Working at rebuilding your relationship takes patience, time and effort.
Your situation and a positive outcome are limited by what you know. Learn about making up and more techniques and hints you can implement to get the love back by visiting my website: http://the-magic-of-making-up-a-review.blogspot.com/
Source: www.isnare.com
Permanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=320989&ca=Relationships
